I am not sure why this has hit me so hard lately. While I was at times even more stressed or even more busy than I am now, I often lack motivation when I come home after work. I did change from a part-time job and writing my PhD thesis alongside that job to a full-time job in another different yet not completely alien field. But when I get home … well, I just can’t be bothered to read a book or sometimes even listen to an audiobook. I was also not really motivated to write reviews and come up with any kind of content for my blog. Maybe that’s because I am starring at a computer for such a long time everyday that I am relieved when I don’t have to.
It stressed me out in the beginning – the lack of content on my blog, the lack of books on my night stand, the stagnating number of books in my Goodreads challenge. Somehow that seemed to increase my reading slump or my lack of motivation. I lost the enjoyment of reading. I am slowly coming back from this with small, short and enjoyable books that are not daunting and preferable children’s books or Agatha Christie’s. They always get me into my comfortable zone. I also reduced my Goodreads challenge to 30 books instead of 45. This also reduced a lot of self-imposed pressure.
Yet, I am not sure I can maintain this happy feeling. A lot of things are changing at work again and I have to find my rhythm – again. And then there are those moments in live that show you how short it can be. My friend had a severe brain infection and though it was a miracle that she made it out of this okay, another friend then got hit by a car with severe brain trauma and several emergency surgeries. Life is full of surprises and sadly not only good ones. I love reading and I love to dive into new worlds, funny stories, and great adventures, but I also need to go back and live some more of these adventures. The older I got, the more I achieved or felt like I have to achieve, the more I lost track of the living my life part. So I will try to find a new rhythm of living, working, reading, blogging, and adventures. But that might also mean a more or less regular content on my blog (though I will get my reading months up soon since I simply forgot to post August) and just an occasional sign of life on my Instagram. I hope you bear with me. 🙂